Cutie is here!!!! ;) Welcome Lili Alice Stoddard!

Life doesn't always go as planned, Right??? Well it certainly didn't this week for me or Cutie. Well Tuesday was just another day in my eyes. I was at home hanging out with Emma. I called my doctor at about 8:30 am to ask to swith my inducement date for Wednesday instead of Friday bc it was easier for babysitters and my husband's job. Well about noon me and em were eating our lunch and I started feeling yuck. I started having pains in my tummy. I wasn't so sure what they were... But by 130 I was having constant contractions and told my mom and stacey that I think that I was in labor. My sister took my to the hospital. Well.. I was at a 7 almost 8. WOW! I was in labor!!!!!!! And It was all fast after that... I had Cutie at 520 pm with one push!!!!. She had pooped inside so she was just covered in yucky poop. I felt so bad for her. She was also pretty purple. I got to hold her for a few moments before they took me to get my tubal done. I didn't realize she was going to be so sick. After I was recovering from my surgery they came in and told me that she wasn't breathing well and it could have been from the poop and me taking zoloft during pregnancy and she was staying in the NICU. I was just so sad. I felt like I did something wrong while taking the meds I did while I was pregnant. I feel so gulity! ;( She is doing okay now and feeling better. She is off oxygen and is now bottle feeding. She will have to stay in the NICU for a few more days until she can eat and her heart valve will close. We will see more tonight with her lab results coming in at about 8 pm. I am excited to get her home and super scared to have two babies. eeek. We named her Lili Alice and she is beautiful. She has blondish brown hair and she is super smaller then I thought she would be. She weighed in at 6lbs 04 ozs and 19 1/4 inch. She is so cute!!!!! :) Noah is excited about being a new brother but is sad bc he hasn't seen her yet. And he is ready to hold her. Miss Em is now teething and is grumpy. She has no idea her life has changed yet. lol... I am going day by day. But I just in love with all these kids. Its so strange how much love you share with someone you just meet. AWWWWWWW... I love being a mom and I am ready to see this new wild side of mom.

The end is in sight. Here is 39 weeks!

Okay, So I am slightly freaking out now.. I know it sounds strange because I have wanted this baby out forever now but now that the time is almost here I am scared out of my mind. I can't believe the end result is only days away... DAYS! So strange so strange. I went to the doctor yesterday morning for a weekly checkup. Well... Its been a very long few weeks. I have been kinda difficult. I have had sickness like the flu. I have been also in painful due back achs and the baby is pinching my nerve making half of my hip has been painful. And I have also been every emotional. So basically I am waiving my white flag. I AM DONE. lol.. Its been a 2 long emotional years. So the end of this story means that the doctor said if I don't have Cutie this week, Friday the 28th is the day I will go in to be induced. She had orginally said Monday the 24th but I am so not ready then. (Which is weird) But I need some more time with Noah and Emma alone. I feel like I am going to be so crazy that I will feel bad not being able to spend the time I do now with them. Which is hard as it is. So I have like a week. A WEEK! Then I will be done being pregnant forever. I am excited for my family to be complete and start working hard on being a good mom to three kids and then I will work on myself. I am normally a very happy person well I try to be. I try to be very postitive about life and everything. But, after giving birth to Emma I had very fast depression and I don't think I have yet recovered. So, I am scared that I will be very depressed again. AHHHHHHH!!!!!!! But, I know that it's been a rollarcoaster for the past 2 years. Life has been Crazy!!! But I know that its going to be okay. I am a woman and a mother, I have to be strong for these kids no matter what happens to me. I am just ready to start getting my emotions in order and to get me back. I will be a better mother and just a person when I do. I love being a mom and I am truly excited to be a mom again. Sure, I am scared out of my mind not only just to have 3 kids but to have 2 babies that are 10.5 months apart. But, I am excited to meet my new baby and blend my family. ;) More details about Cutie coming soon. And more details about Noah and Emma handling miss cutie as well.. .Thanks for reading! Wish me luck!!!

37.5 weeks, 10 months, and a Second grader

I am officially 37.5 weeks along with Cutie. And I still haven't decided on a name. Stacey thinks that Madison is the name... I am not so sure. Why is this so hard???? Noah and Emma were a peice of cak. But, Cutie is Cutie, Ya know? But how could I do that to a child!?! lol.. We will see when she will get here what her name will be. Pregnancy is slowing down and I am feeling all the loveliness of being full term and everything wrapped up in that. 2 years of being pregnant is killing me. I am seriously counting down the days. But It is a bittersweet experience because I love my babies and I really don't mind being pregnant. I love feeling the baby move and feeling all the first feelings when you are pregnant. But I am tired, swollen, hormonal, and fat. It is time to be done! Plus getting a very cute baby instead is always worth it. Today, I have been cleaning and organizing my room in hopes of getting ready for Cutie's arrival. I am still freaking out about having 2 little babies at the same time but I feel like I am needing to prepare! lol... My hospital bag is almost complete and only a few more times need to be added. I have everything I need really, which is nice. And I even set up Cutie's bed today. YIKES!!!! But 2.5 weeks more and then she will be here. I better get ready now!!!!! I am still working away trying not too get bored. I have lots of do and get miss Emma on a better schedule. But I like staying busy it really is making the time go faster! Emma decided to turn 10 months on Sept 10th. WHAT!?! Everyday I swear she is getting bigger and bigger. I can't believe she was a small little tiny thing only a few months ago. Which is sad. Babies grow up too fast!!!! Emma loves dancing!she is so cute!!!!! It doesn't matter what the song is she is moving shaking her booty! It makes everyone laugh even her! She is also clapping and waving. CAN YOU HEAR ME SHE IS ADORABLE!!!!! She also makes the cutest snorting noises when she is excited. ;) She is remaining toothless still which is sad, but I swear she is teething at the moment! She is so so so cute!!!!!!! Noah decided to start 2nd grade on Sept 4th. HE IS TOO BIG!!!! Talk about babies growing up too fast!!!!! His teacher this year is Ms Lindsey. She seems really great so far but its only the second week. But you have to be pretty good if you are teaching little kids. Noah is loving being back at school and with his friends. And I actually enjoy doing homework with him. He doesn't particularly like it with me. But, he can't change that so he better deal right!?! He is enjoying watching new tv shows and playing video games. Which I am trying to limit. (he is doing great with the limitations and has hardly complained (:) He loves the color blue and Boise State Broncos football. He is loving playing outside still and he can't wait for the snow. Silly Kid. He is just so big I don't know what to do with him. But I love my first baby and he is the best brother ever!!!!!!! Well that is it for now! I will let you know when miss Cutie makes her appearance. Hopefully she will be a few. I am not really ready for 2 babies. lol.